Dead Memories
by Prosthetics
Summary: DomxOC
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the Gears of War characters, except for Evelyn Thomson. I wrote this purely for my own twisted pleasure.

xxxxxx

After two exhausting weeks on the frontline, I threw my kit down, slamming the door shut haphazardly, and collapsed onto my comforting bed. I could have slept for a thousand hours if it wasn't for my roommate grieving, sobbing his heart out. I bolted up right in bed, too disturbed and caring to want to sleep and ignore the heart-wrenching tragedy that only sat on the bed across from me.

Starting to climb off the bed, I saw him hunched over with his face buried in his large, rough hands, struggling ever so desperately to hold himself up. I could see him shaking; the way his muscular body racked with overwhelming sadness ached my own heart and soul. He was broken beyond belief and I knew damn well that he blamed himself for the cause. I couldn't leave him in such a horrid state; someone had to stand up. That someone was going to be me.

Off the bed now, I slowly made my way over to my roommate and partner on the frontline among our other best friend. My chest heaved erratically as my nerves whacked out which meant I was horribly nervous. I had no idea as to how he was going to react. I sat down next to him, not sure if I should place a calm hand on his shoulder. I've never been in this situation before, not since Carlos.

"Dom, I…." I was at a loss for words but Dom seemed to be full of them as he opened up to me, a stream of fresh hot tears pouring from his eyes.

"I couldn't save my own fucking wife. I couldn't find her in time. I just….I…couldn't save her. I failed and I promised that I would never give up on her." At this moment, my heart sank down into stomach, vile stomach acid painfully eating away at my vital organ. Without hesitating this time, I planted my left shaky hand onto his right shoulder, signally that I was here for him and no one else.

When it came to coming up with something to soothe him, my mind was dead like a ghost's. All train of thought flew out the window. "Shh…it's not your-

"I had to shoot my own fucking wife. You should have seen her, Evie. She was emaciated, barely any flesh was on her frail bones but what flesh she had left, it was vile and graying like a victim who was tortured for years on end without stop. I was convinced that I would snap her in half after only holding her in my arms. Her once luscious, silky long black hair was reduced to patches on her head. And her face…..two identically scars ran across her face angrily. Her body bore her a million years old; she was sure to die at any moment but I….I was convinced that I could attempt to save her, that she was safe with me now and I would never let any of those goddamn grubs get a hold of her a second time. I would fucking rip their goddamn throats out and cut out their hearts, if they had any. You don't know what it was like, Evie….you simply don't know." He approved of my comforting now and leaned against me for support. I tried my best to hold him now.

He was right: I didn't know but I did understand the toll it took on him. I had heard from Marcus about Maria's death but he seemed to leave the details out and now I understand why. Such a gut-wrenching story it was and I wanted to cry out with Dom but he needed me. Needed me to be strong for him. I had known Maria for we were once friends, meeting before I became a Gear. And plus, I knew what it was like to lose someone you loved. Sixteen years ago, I lost the love of my life, one of Marcus Fenix's best friends and Dominic Santiago's older brother. Hell, we all were best buddies but Carlos was different. We were meant to be together, either for good or for worse. I watched Carlos die in battle and even though he was a hero I still mourn for him, wishing that I could have found another way to save him but as always my actions weren't good enough. Because I wasn't good enough.

Ha. Listen to me wallowing in sorrow when it shouldn't be me at the moment. It's been sixteen years, sixteen agonizing years. I can still cope very well but sometimes nightmares creep upon like monsters lurking in the pitch black, waiting to strike and eat me alive, their sharp teeth tear my flesh off piece by piece. I should be over this by now but I can remember it as if it happened yesterday…..

Anyways, my point is…I know Dom's pain but not as much as him. He lost his brother, his children, his parents, and now his loving wife. All I was missing was, Carlos and a small significant other. I was long away from experiencing true loss, sorrow. I shouldn't be sulking off, moping around. I had to be strong. For the both of us.

"You're right. I don't know and I never will but I do know is that I am always here for you. You're family." My words were meaningless, stupid but I had nothing better to say that was more soothing.

"Maria didn't even recognize me. She was broken and twisted, tortured beyond comprehension. The sight was something out of a horror movie and I never thought it would be me as the main character. She was too traumatized to remember me, Evelyn. She was a ghost of her former self and I was too late to see it. Oh god…..I love her so much. How could I shoot her in the head like a fucking monster?" Dom went on in pain.

"No, not a monster. You did the right thing, even if you think you could have chosen something more successful. You ended her pain, there was nothing you could have done but be there. Those bastards didn't kill her." I almost choked up as I forced myself to speak these unearthly words out loud. "Don't blame yourself, Dom."

What a hypocrite I must've sounded like after saying that. I couldn't even follow my own advice and he knew this. He was smart enough to see through my bullshit.

"Ten fucking years and I blew it. I failed."

Out of his armor, I was able to hold him easier. I rocked back and forth like a frightened, beaten little girl for my own sake. I stroked his face like my father used to do when I was scared and sobbing uncontrollably as an innocent child. Being a child trying to live innocent in a shit hole, apocalyptic world like this was hard to preserve it but it was worth it. I also failed to protect an innocent black haired boy, shield him from all the terrors in life. At three years old, I lost my baby, my last living connection.

"I know you loved her as she did you so much. You can call out my bullshit later on but I want to you listen here and now. She's watching over you at this very moment, standing with Benedicto and Sylvia. Honestly, I need to believe this along with..Ca…him standing with them. It would more than kill me if I didn't hold onto this. It helps me deal with the…pain….and…."

A strand of my silky black hair moved in front of my face, annoying me like pestering flies swarming me to no avail. Being considerate, Dom reached up and moved the strand of hair of the way, tucking it gently behind my right ear.

"You had absolutely nothing to do with what happened to Carlos. Marcus told me the entire story. It's alright now, Evelyn." He choked on his own words. A few hot tears sprung from my own eyes. Why did I feel so ashamed, so angered and hurt once again?

I tried to smirk but I just couldn't. "Now, you're bullshitting me, Dominic. It's not alright but what else is there to do? Hope is all that we can fight to hold on to. Taking it for granted and pushing it to the curb is suicide. Hope is all we've got and we can't risk losing it,"

Dom opened his mouth to say something insightful but nothing came out, like he was dumbstruck. I doubt that my words were inspiring, though how else was I expected to mend him when I needed the same comfort now as well? While hope wasn't entirely enough, it was good enough to get you through the long, winded day.

Being unobservant, I hadn't noticed that Dom was stroking my face with his large hand; his touch was gentle as if he could break my jaw with a snap of his fingers if he weren't careful. His fingers brushed against the scarred skin beside my left eye, feeling where two nasty scars ran down my eye; my life had been in a state of recklessness at one point. His touch wasn't friendly, it was something more….and then I realized that I had been crying; my eyes had to be red and puffy shamefully.

I turned my head as he wiped my tears. With my free hand, I gripped my stomach. My baby was gone as well. "Carlos was the father, wasn't he?" He asked.

"You already knew that." Little Damon was a beautiful black haired boy who is mischievous yet I loved him to death. He was my last living connection to Carlos Santiago and I lost him as I lost his father. I was a failure but neither none of them had given up on me. Should I have done the same to myself?

Grabbing his wandering hand, I held it in my two hands, feeling the roughness of his skin. He felt warm unlike my cold self. Along the side of his hand, I planted kisses, a dormant habit of Dom's brother Carlos Santiago for when he wanted to be intimate. "I'll be alright, though. It's been so long but my thoughts dwell into the dark and I can't help stop them from swallowing me whole, spitting me out into a pit of hell. You shouldn't be worrying about me. I was supposed to be here comforting you about Maria and you're….."

I was suddenly cut off as a finger was pushed against my lips. "We'll figure this out together," Shifting out of my lose hold, he sat himself up, his face only inches from mine; heat radiated off the two of us like imulsion fumes mixing together. Both hands on either side of my face, he tasted my full pink lips without signally any warning, His glossy tongue swirled around in my moist mouth, his breath smelled of nicotine. My senses flared, my first instinct wanting to jerk away, but I found myself giving in to him, owing him just that much. I was weak.

I felt his hands trail down my face, down my shoulders, until they reached my chest. His fingers pushed past my COG tags until they got in his way so he decided on lifting them off me, throwing them to the floor without ease. Through my tang top, he groped my breasts as if he wore eager for them. I shuddered, eager for him but that would be taking advantage of him.

Dom leaned his head down, his lips nibbling on my smooth skin, forcing me to tilt my head back; a small moan escaping from my lips so silent that Dom couldn't hear it but I stole a small glimpse and saw that he bared his teeth in a half-forced smile. Ripping my shirt off in one quick second, he forced his hands underneath me, gripping my ass, and lifted me up and on to his strong lap, my legs hitched around his waist.

My black bra was all too small for my breasts and Dom seemed to make no complaints about the matter. Unclasping my bra and letting it fall to the floor, my milk-white, plump breasts revealing their true self to the man before me. Starved, he sucked on both, biting in between. A moan escaped from my lips just as he buried his face in my warm chest; my womanhood was twice as warm…and moist. Before I could respond, he kissed the cool flesh of my stomach until he decided that my pants had to go. Whirling us around, he pushed me down on his bed with force, pouncing on top of me without hesitation. Before unzipping my tight black pants which had to be sticking to my creamy smooth skin, he whipped his head up, mentally asking me whether or not I wanted to continue.

Dom and I were both starved sexually, though that didn't really seem to worry us because there were other matters at stake to deal with. Dom has never been with another woman before. I cannot remember the last I had sex—not since Carlos died sixteen years ago. Honestly, I wanted this. I wanted Dom more than he desired me. Indicating that I wanted-no I needed him- I ripped at his shirt. Shirtless, I groped his muscular, toned chest and in return, he pulled off my tight fitting pants and panties. Teasing me with his tongue, and damn he knew how to work it, he reached down to my wet, impatient pussy. His head down, he worked his tongue between my legs, ravaging my clit so fucking much I was about to burst. Against the firm bed, my back arched, my body tingled and shuddered, loving all the dirty things he was doing to me.

"Dom….Oh…Dom…" His tongue was like a serpent, a god like device given to him. He licked me clean, having me only release myself on to him which I submissively licked off him. My lily white thighs tingled as my pussy throbbed, screaming to Dom for him to take me right now. His pants and boxers were the very last things to go, joining my pile of clothing.

"Do you want this, Evie?" He demanded, orally assaulting me with his luscious mouth, his stubby beard grazing against the opening of my wet womanhood. I nodded my head which wasn't enough for Dominic Santiago. He wanted me begging to the heavens. "Say you want me, Evelyn. Admit it or I'll leave this instant." Giving me no time to react, he took two fingers and forced them straight into my cunt, moving them in and out roughly. I spread my legs further apart for him, allowing him more free movement. Underneath him I squirmed, dying for him to move faster…and harder. "Evelyn, say it."

"Fuck me, now!" I half screamed, not caring who listening, not even Marcus who had to be sleeping in the room next to ours. "I want you so fucking badly!" I panted loudly, the air around us steamy, and I explored his marvelously sculpted thighs, squeezing them hard, having the need to taste his flesh. Wanting to take control, he grabbed both writs and with one hand, he pinned them above my head. "Harder. Faster, Dom." The muscles of my pussy pounded against his fingers just as I was ready to burst, my sweet cum spraying over his face again.

With his cock aching terribly to slip deep into me after years of being dormant, he suddenly plunged right into me with all his force, causing me to gasp and inhale what pain surged through me, my hands gripping his muscle toned back. My nails dug into his lush skin as he pumped harder, faster into me, engulfing my insides with his throbbing dick. "You are so fucking tight, Evie, it's not even funny." He gritted his teeth as he forced all of himself in me and then out, thrusting into me with the force of an all mighty god. In between thrusts, he licked and kissed my creamy breasts, getting the best of me. The pain faded away and pleasured flowed through me, like when I gave my virginity to Carlos.

Panting loudly, I wanted more of Dom inside me. I wanted him to fuck me furiously, pounding so deep into me that I exploded. And I wanted to wrap my lips around his cock to show him the immense amount of pleasure I felt but I was held down whether I wanted to be or not.

"I could squeeze through a mouse hole than your fucking cunt. Fuck," This time he moaned, pumping faster now and harder until…exhaustion took over the both of us. Sweating and catching his breath, he pulled out of me and collapsed beside my naked form, grabbing and taking me in his huge arms. "Fuck, Evie. I haven't…..fucked like an animal since Maria and I sent the kids to my parents' two weeks before E-day." In the moment, he planted a kiss on my forehand which meant to be insignificant but in reality, we both knew what it actually meant. "Thank you, Evie."

Why was he thanking me for? I wanted this just as much as he desperately needed to fuck. Before I could open my mouth to reply, he beat me to the punch: "Honestly, I really needed that. You truly are a great friend and-"

"Whoa, Dominic! Don't say like a sister, because after our little sexual frustration tonight, I believe I have to give up that title." I cut him off, stroking his arm and kissed him back.

"….And I know you will always be there for me. You're pretty loyal, you know that and don't say it's because I was there when my brother died. Let's just say that you were here for me tonight at the right time. We're close and for that, I'm grateful."

"Dom?"

"What is it, Evelyn?"

"Just shut up." And I leaned forward and crashed my lips against his. Sometimes it was better off to not say anything, even if they had good intentions. "But I'm not saying your welcome because I rather enjoyed it."

"You rather enjoyed it?" He glared down at me.

"Fuck you," The words rolled right off my tongue in a sultry manner.

"Evelyn," He warned.

Ah shit, did he really want me to admit it out loud?

"The best I ever had, you fucker."

An unexpected series of pounding on the door suddenly had us startled to no end. "Who is it?" Dom sounded like he was annoyed for the interruption. It was like two in the morning. Who the hell was it this late? "I'm a little busy in here…."

"I'm not looking for you." The stern voice of Marcus Fenix had the both of us dashing off the damned bed and scrambling to pull our clothes on. "I'm looking for Evelyn." My heart nearly stopped.

"Just a second." Properly dressed, I threw on my boots, tying the laces up. There was no way I could face Marcus, not when my face was flustered. "On second thought, give me a few minutes."

There was an abrupt pause from Marcus, like he was hesitating. "Forget it, Evelyn. I want to have a word with you after dawn. Get some sleep for once. You're gonna need it..."

Dom waited a minute before he inquired, "What do you think that was about?" I knew he was only acting clueless in case Marcus was listening in. Nah, I doubt he would do that. He was decent but then again, the walls were pretty thin to begin with.

"I don't know." Marcus' words 'You're gonna need it' entered my mind. "He wasn't too happy with it."

"He's going to eat you alive, Evie." Dom pointed out. Necessarily, I wasn't in trouble but there was something between us, not romantic, at least I don't think so at the moment. Baird called it a "special relationship" but that was pretty perverse. Either way, it was just like that but much more complicated.

"Yeah, like I didn't know that already..." I scoffed and threw my boots off.

"You gonna confess to him?"

"I'm a grown woman for fucks sake! He has no control over my private life. He can't possibly do anything over me fucking you." Or maybe he was jealous...

"Wait! What are you doing?"

"I'm exhausted, Dom. You tired me out even more."

"Come back over here, will you?" Wrapping an arm around me, he pulled me back on to his bed, laying me down with him. So...he wasn't done coping yet, huh? While he was starting to have some life back into him, I could still see the pain in his face. If staying in his arms for the night meant he would get a good night's rest and wouldn't look like shit afterwards, then I would do just that.

Whatever gets him through the night peacefully is all that matters, I thought. I just wished I could take his pain away for more than half an hour...


	2. Chapter 2

_I could smell him, feel the warmth of his body right on top of mine. His breath was a mix of mint and steak from evening's dinner that his mother prepared specially for us. We were both on leave for the next week, surprisingly, so now here we were. Rare opportunities like lying in bed, enjoying your partner's company, were hard to come by and preserved by me. There was barely any time for simple pleasures so this time, I didn't take any of it for granted. Life is too short…and unfair. It's funny how you realize just how precious life is after you've lost everything._

_Grabbing my hand, he caressed it with gentleness. I loved the feeling his touch; it always made me feel secure and wanted. It was a feeling that I grew accustomed to. "Today, did I ever tell you how much you mean to me?" _

"_Actually, yes. Yes you have." Carlos's words brought a genuine smile to my face. He was sweet; I don't think I've ever seen his bad side and we barely spent time together, not while on duty. We exchanged looks and gestures, sometimes even comments, but that was all. Being discreet and then having times like now were what kept me sane. "You know that I love you the same."_

_With the bed sheets still covering him, he got up to lean over the bed, picking up what appeared to be a small white box, the same one used for proposing. My heart fluttered, overwhelming anxiety and impatience flowing through me like a stream. _

"_I wanted to wait until the war toned down, but I just couldn't wait any longer." His words were so simple yet they meant so much more. From the glowing look in his eyes, I knew what he was going to do next. "Evie, will you- Wake up!" My heart instantly sank down into a pit of fire as disappointment and confusion entered me. This wasn't supposed to happen! This night was supposed to be full of passion and Carlos was going to propose to me. What the hell was going on?_

"_Carlos?" I sounded as if I were lost. He replied by giving me a strange look, as if I was truly out of it again. Maybe I was just imagining things. "What did you saying? I didn't get that," I knew he wanted to say, 'Are you alright' but the words were never spoken._

"_Will you marry me?" He asked, opening the small white and inside it was a gorgeous ring. I was overwhelmed with happiness as the best day of my life finally came true nut it felt nostalgic, like I've experienced this before. I didn't care in the least. _

"_Yes," I would become his wife and love him until the day I die. Those words would never come out of my mouth, at least not yet. _

"_Evelyn, wake up now. Evelyn." The deep, demanding voice returned once again. Much to my dismay, the voice did not belong to my Carlos. Unfathomably, it was Marcus's. No, he wasn't supposed to be here…._

"Wake up," I was being roughly shaken awake, interrupting my nostalgic dream and causing me to curse at the person responsible. Opening my eyes, I discovered Marcus to be hovering over me. Sitting up, I found Dom to be missing, a sense of abandonment surged through me. Where could he have gone this early in the morning? That's when it hit me that it was well over seven o'clock.

"What are you doing here?" Suddenly, I remembered that Marcus wanted to speak with me. I was kind of hoping he would have forgotten about it by now.

"Get out of bed and suit up. We're leaving in an hour." Marcus ordered and I obeyed. It was obvious that something was going down because I was given a few days off.

"If you don't mind me asking, what's going on?" I asked after making myself presentable.

" I don't have all the details at the moment but shit went down southeast of the capital. You shouldn't even be allowed to come along after the stunt you pulled yesterday but we're going to need you. Get going." He was never the one to sound at all cheery but and he rarely did but this time, he spoke to me as if we were just Gears and nothing more.

"I know what I did was pretty reckless….." Before I could even finish my sentenced, he went on.

"You could've gotten yourself killed and what makes that ten times worse is that you nearly endangered other lives. Do you think I want to see **you**-or anyone else-get hurt or possibly die?" Now, he was just lecturing me but he was right. He meant well and deep down, I knew he truly cared.

"Alright, _sarge. _I'll try to refrain from pulling another selfish and stupid stunt in the near future. _Are you satisfied now?" _I promised, attempting to usher him out of the room so I could get ready.

"_You know that's never enough._ Just don't make me regret this decision." Turning around and about to head out the door, he abruptly stopped in his tracks and faced me, looking me dead in the eyes. "Dom usually looks like complete shit and doesn't sleep well these days. This morning, he seemed to have a little life in him and that's more than I can say but I wouldn't say that changed him at all. You were here with him…" Oh, I knew where he was going with this.

"Marcus, the man was practically broken. I simply went and talked to him, seeing as no one else interfered. I just….I felt bad. He needed comforting and nothing more occurred, alright?" Marcus wasn't dumb. He could tell I was lying; he heard us last night but wouldn't come right out and state the obvious. Instead, he was playing mind games with me until I got it.

"_Yeah, sure._" He snorted. "Just get going. We'll talk later." His stare, full of coldness, burned into me. He couldn't have been angry or jealous. I mean, we're not even together, even if there was something between us but it was nothing relationship wise. Barely anything at all, I must say. Watching him walk away, I sighed. This was going to be a long day.

xxxxxx

"Control, this is Delta. Echo Squad Six is KIA. The area is clear but the road is blocked."

"I'm sorry Delta but I'm not seeing an alternate route. We won't be able to dispatch any assistance until tomorrow."

"Then I guess we're setting up camp nearby. Delta out."

Terrible pain racked through my body with six bullets lodged into my left shoulder and my right leg torn up. Sticky dark red blood streamed down the side of my face along with a nasty swollen bruise after taking a blow from the butt of a stolen Lancer, nearly taking a gutting from one of those damned Locusts. I knew I was fucked the moment the grub revved its chainsaw and came charging at me full speed. Making no amends to jump out of the way, I made a suicide attempt and went on after the bastard. Luckily, Marcus intervened and shot the grub before I could even be gutted.

Even though, I still could have fought even with an injured arm and a torn up leg, I wasn't fast….or strong enough. I hated being weak. I remember Marcus helping me up off the ground since I couldn't myself, him asking me with worry if I was alright. As if on instinct, we locked eyes. The way his eyes glistened towards me…it was…like how Carlos looked at me, his eyes sparking only in my presence. I cannot explain it for you have to be the one seeing it but I suddenly felt this pressure build up inside of me, knots tying up in my stomach. I've never seen him this way before, so concerned for someone's well-being like this before. Was I just imagining things?

Oh god, I'm probably going insane…

Setting up camp inside a building, I found myself hunched over in a plastic chair, biting down on my tongue as Dom pulled up the six bullets in my shoulder. I wanted to scream, to curse obscenities but I held myself together. I hated showing I was weak. Sometimes, it only got you killed.

"You're gonna need stitches." Dom stated as he finished bandaging my arm and went for my leg next. Aw…how thoughtful of him.

"I also need a fucking bottle of pain killers. I'll go to the hospital first thing in the morning, if we get the hell out of here." I replied. I wasn't too worried. I've lived with worse injuries. "Thanks, by the way." The air around us was hot. While bandaging me, I noticed how I moved differently whenever Dom's skin brushed against my skin. He knew this as well.

Dom was quiet, but that was to be expected.

"Hey, hang in there, Dom. I'm here for you." After last night, these words meant something else entirely. I hadn't meant them _that _way.

"I just…I still love her. I don't think I could ever get over her." I said the same thing about Carlos but everyone runs on their own pace. He would never fully heal from Maria's death. He shouldn't blame himself and I desperately wish once again to take his pain and give him the peace he deserves.

"If you wanna talk, you know I'm here."

Having no more words exchanged between us, Dom shifted his seat, inching closer to mine with his lips just inches from my own. He pressed his hands down onto both my knees, his lost eyes scanning my weary eyes. I closed my eyes, ignoring my pain, and leaned in. My body relaxed for the first time in a while as I felt lips crash on to mine with less hungriness than last night. I understood his need for something more. Opening my eyes, I came to find Dom pulling away from me before anything else evolved.

"They could be in the other room and besides, you look like you were just run over. Take it easy, alright Evie?"

"I can't say I will but alright," I nodded, pulling out the last pack of my sweet cigarettes just as Dom left the room.

Exhaling, I took a long drag of my cigarette, a slow wave of relaxation filling through me, addiction intruding and causing my pain to fade away almost. Leaning back in my plastic chair, I kicked my feet up on to the worn office desk, my leather army boots scuffed up whatever profound and scared polish the surface had. Peace invaded my restless mind, dead silence and the strong scent of tobacco enveloped me. A smoke, or rather a sweet cancer stick, between my full pink lips never was so pleasurable before because they were rare to come by yet I never smoked until the war erupted.

War, or even the slightest destruction, changes you whether you want it to or not. Devastation hits you or you die, forcing you to change your motives and sometimes you just may be finding yourself smoking your troubles away like a fucking chimney as I am doing now. I never would've known that I was injured after this.

The door to the room was abruptly opened, not softly but harshly as if the person intended harm. In came Marcus, who seemed to be towering over me with a sense of authority….and concern.

Shit, I knew why he was here.

"Evelyn, we need to talk. Now."


End file.
